"So I understand you have a clip to show us?" (Under Construction)

How to Destroy Angels

"So I understand you have a clip to show us?" (Under Construction)

How to Shoot Scene 8 From a Film Called "Sometimes, God Smiles Back"

First, start with a clever script. It should be witty, but not too obvious. Make it dark. That young, hipster-art crowd likes it when you make it dark. Almost for sure you can get away with making a total piece of crap, as long as it is witty and dark. Always remember, the 18-34 year old demographic is all that matters, when it comes to deciding whether it is crap or not.

Next, cast Michael Gambino as "Joe" and Hans Fleishmann as "Cyd." They are a couple of swell guys. They know how to help you make it witty and dark. The hip-hop crowd refers to this process as, "keeping it real."

Now find a guy like Mike Trice to run camera, Stephanie Holloway for audio, John Ceperich as your grip, and Jason Scovel as the gaffer. Jason doesn't seem to mind if you refer to him as, "Tummy."

Now, shoot your Scene 8 on a beautiful, early April afternoon-- the type you might experience in a town like Chicago, Illinois. Shoot it on a Canon XL1. Don't be afraid to use a wide angel lens, with the f-stop at 4 and a shutter speed of 1/1700. On beautiful, early April afternoons, you may find it is uselful to use a UV filter, a Circular Polarizing filter (for that beautiful, early April blue sky), and a Neutral Density 6 filter. Don't hesitate to let Mike and Hans improvise. They really are swell guys, you know.

You will probably need to steal the shot in a junk yard somewhere, as us witty and dark types seldom have the time (or the money) to apply for a proper shooting permit. Mayor Daley doesn't really mind. He's got bigger fish to fry.

Finally, get Brian Kallies to edit your Scene 8. You may find it beneficial to the integrity of your scene to give Brian very specific instructions. Shoot slates and log your timecodes, so that he doesn't get all carried away with that whole annoying, "creativity" thing. Learn to make the editor your slave. It's more fun that way!

IF ALL ELSE FAILS

Despite these easy-to-follow instructions, from time to time we here at the H.T.I. home office receive correspondences from individuals who have encountered difficulties when shooting their own Scene 8 from Sometimes, God Smiles Back. Do not be discouraged. Now is not the time to panic. Actually, the time to panic is when the security guard comes over and tells you to leave his junk yard, before he calls the local authorities.

Each and every project you endeavor upon presents its own unique series of challenges and obstacles. While many of us are invigorated and inspired by such challenges, others begin to feel a sense of hopelessness in the face of seemingly unsurmountable forces which foil them at every opportunity. If you find yourself in such a dilemma and seek a reason to press on, please feel free to click on the icon below and download OUR version of Scene 8. Also, cocaine sometimes helps an individual overcome this notion of self-doubt, as well. At least for a few minutes.

Please bear in mind that we are geniuses, and we make it look easy. But, after many long years of study and hard work, you may eventually find yourself filled with enough of our genius to complete your own clip. Wouldn't that be cool?

ABOVE: Two swell guys.

Ó 2001 & 2002 H.T.I. Productions. Any unauthorized reproduction- without the express written consent of H.T.I.- is strictly prohibited. So dont even think about it, punk!